Don’t be that person. You know, the guy or gal who waited an entire year to make life-altering decisions on the first of the brand spanking New Year. Like, if you wanted to do whatever it is that you chose as your resolution so bad why in the Sam Cassell, Jr., have  you waited  so long? Seriously, what in the heck was wrong with quitting smoking, drinking, losing some pounds or giving up visiting professional streetwalkers on the regular that you couldn’t do that on October 14? I mean, if it were that important. Alas, it is a day for false hope. Where your significant other swears to change, Uncle Lou gives up the sauce, and some person near your cubicle swears that he/she (or maybe a he-she) will never touch chocolate again. So, um, basketball — kind of.

Worth Every Penny. (Photo: Mark Dolejs – USA TODAY Sports)

Jim Harbaugh left the not-so-friendly confines of the NFL for a coaching job at Michigan. It has been reported that the khaki-wearing football savant will be making roughly $7 million a year to coach some unpaid labor. And, you know what, he is worth every penny. Please, let me explain why and how this also correlates as to why college basketball coaches who get paid large sums of money deserve it as well.

Do you think there are actual X-and-O coaches as good as Jim Harbaugh out there? Of course there are. The same could be said for many college basketball coaches. To think that Coach K is literally the single best on-the-floor general on the entire planet is nuts. To think that — even if it were true — being the best in-game coach is the sole reason he wins lots of games is silly. In fact, there might be some guy in Budapest right now, coaching some third-tier division, who actually might know more stuff about the game than Harbaugh or Coach K. However, the two have something that separates them from the rest of the hundreds and hundreds of excellent coaches who get run from their jobs. It happens to be the same exact thing that made The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels a WWE Hall of Famer, but Marty Jannetty some form of cautionary tale/joke.

It’s personality. Either one of or a combination of having some charm, wit, understanding of families or something else that separates you from William McCoachyourpantsoffthehardwood. So, yeah, Harbaugh is going to Michigan after his worst season in the NFL and he deserves every single penny. It is the same reason John Calipari, Coach K and Brian McRecruityourmotherscraniumoutofitsskin are also worth every cent thrown in their general direction. Does that mean I am comfortable with college coaches getting millions of dollars off the backs of unpaid labor? Heck to the no. However, it is what it is until some sanity comes from the governing body of college sports or big time universities finally secede from the ineptness that is the NCAA.

I will argue though, until the end of gosh slam time, that Marty Jannetty is a tag-team specialist that no soul on this planet can touch. He’ll Rocker Dropper your rear to sleep if you think otherwise.

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In some surprising but not surprising news, North Carolina recently landed top prospect Jalek Felton. Felton — the nephew of Raymond Felton — is a top-10 recruit in the class of 2017 (yes, three years from now). His commitment is not surprising because of his family connection as well as it being the North F’ng Carolina Tar Heels. It is surprising, on the other hand, because it is the North F’ng Carolina Tar Heels who are in somewhat hot water over a maybe, probably, okay who knows, paper class scandal.

Depending on which outlets you read, either UNC is definitely going to get shook down because it certainly did something evil *OR* UNC didn’t do anything wrong and the major media outlets — as well as some blogs — are out on a witch hunt against the Tar Heels. I have no idea which side is right, but if I am a tippy-top-recruit (patent still pending… wtf?) I am avoiding any place with any sort of uncertainty altogether. Unless that landing spot was my dream school since I can remember, which may very well be the case for Felton and future possible recruits.

I guess what I am trying to say is, in the most roundabout way as humanly possible, can someone for the love of gawd please find out what is going on with this? It has been a long time now and this is starting to feel like the Miami Hurricanes and Donna Shalala(lalalalalalalala, Merry Christmas) all over again.

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I  have to cut this a wee bit short this week. A few hundred words less than normal. I know, you are sad. A Column of Enchantment is the thing you most look forward to on Thursdays. But, you see, I have many a beer to drink (I write these the day before they are posted, mind you). I have no time left to continue to write a barely about college basketball college basketball column. Still, I will be thinking about my readers when the ball drops and resolutions are supposed to be in full swing. No, I won’t be thinking about you breaking your resolutions by next Monday. Instead, I’ll be thinking about how you probably ruined your one day off of work this week by getting bombed on on some crappy craft beer you never heard of on New Year’s Eve.

Happy New Year’s, you filthy animals.

Joseph Nardone (22 Posts)

Joseph has covered college basketball both (barely) professionally and otherwise for over five years. A Column of Enchantment for Rush The Court on Thursdays and other basketball stuff for The Student Section on other days.

This entry was posted on Thursday, January 1st, 2015 at 12:15 pm by Joseph Nardone and is filed under column of enchantment, Regular Features. Tagged: coach k, coaching, feature, north carolina, recruiting. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.